I’m Right

One of the questions I usually ask each spouse in a marital conflict is this: “Is it more important for you to be right or to resolve the conflict?” You might be surprised to find how many would rather prove themselves “right” at the expense of letting the conflict continue. As a matter of fact, both spouses often get mad at me because I refuse to take their side. Frankly, I could literally care less who is right and who is wrong. I simply focus on resolving the issue. The need to be “right” has pride’s fingerprints all over it and is a huge obstacle to problem solving and communication in any marriage. Don’t waste your time and efforts arguing over who’s right because in the scheme of things it really doesn’t matter. Whatever the issue in your marriage is, put your pride behind you and choose resolution instead. Think of it this way: Who’s right? Who cares?